After 12 years of travelling and living overseas, Jack and I made the decision to move our family of 3 back to Canada. 

A lot of things happened prior to arriving at this decision, including setting ourselves up for another expat opportunity in Munich, Germany with Jack’s company (a job transfer of sorts). For better or worse, that opportunity fell through last minute, keeping us in London for another 18 months. The full story on how Germany came into fruition can be found in my last post ‘Reflections on Mom Life.’

The Unravelling

It’s taken me a long time to conjure up the words to summarise all the events that took place since I last wrote, which is nearly 3 years ago. Now, after a period of trials and tribulations, followed by some much needed reflection, I’m here to give it a shot. 

As mentioned, the unravelling began with the Germany opportunity. Post covid, I gave up my secure job 7 months into my maternity leave, after 5 years of employment. I was working as an Executive Assistant [EA] for someone I admired, in a stunning office in Mayfair, for a business that was (still is) thriving. Additionally, Jack and I gave up our flat in Shoreditch and shipped all of our personal belongings to Germany, while we stayed in temporary accommodation until our anticipated departure date. One week out from our flight, Jack received a call with some bad news. The client had pulled the funding and the project was no longer going ahead – the deal was off. It was an unlucky situation. While there was no blame to be placed, we were now homeless and I was now jobless, 13 months postpartum.

Our most pressing issue was finding a place to live. Fortunately, our landlord hadn’t found a long term tenant yet, so we were able to move back into our old flat in Shoreditch. Next was childcare. We thankfully had Ava’s nanny, who helped us out while I started the job hunt and applying to daycares in the area. I had an an amazing, extended maternity leave with my daughter, but I was ready and excited to get back to work. Alas, I put my head down and applied everywhere. I had a white board in my living room, with scattered notes about different companies for each interview. After completing one, I would erase it and move on to the next. Truthfully, I don’t mind interviews, but I was becoming exhausted with the repetition of it and my long winded explanation as to why I left my previous job… It sounded made up! But I can assure you it wasn’t, and I have the grey hairs to prove it.

During my job search, there was one company that stood out to me, mostly because I really connected with the hiring manager who I now consider a forever friend ;). It was a currency solutions company in Oxford Circus, working 1:1, supporting the Founder & CEO of the business. I would be working with a bunch of young, fun and career focused go-getters. Sign me up! I made it to the third stage interview. The second thing that made this company stand out, was the ease of my interview with the CEO. It wasn’t a classic interview. You know the ones that can feel forced, with a hint of interrogation like, ‘tell me about your yourself,’ or ‘what are your weaknesses?’ It was more a conversation, an opportunity to see if we might be able to trust one another. I came out feeling pretty confident, which was well placed, as I got the job! I then went to Ibiza with a couple of my gal pals to celebrate and started the following week.

Just as everything felt like it was coming together, fast forward 6 months… I passed my probation period, I was feeling more comfortable in the role and I was starting to really enjoying it. But, of course, it was getting just a bit too stable for my reoccurring 2023 theme of turbulence. That CEO, who I too admired, was dismissed from the business, effective immediately. The company goes into chaos, with everyone left wondering, what comes next? Well, I would have another CEO coming in to build another relationship with, just days after I watched the another one leave. I would have to prove myself all over again, which I managed to do – for another 6 months anyway.

The Decision

The moment of truth – should we stay or should we go? The inevitable tearing question reserved for expats. It was mainly prompted by our work visas expiring. After being in London for 7 years, Jack, Ava and I were eligible for Indefinite Leave to Remain – AKA the road to British Citizenship. There is no denying that the longer you stay in one place, the more settled you become, the harder it is to leave. Many expats can relate to the weight of this decision. To assist us in making this choice, Jack and I made a pros and cons sheet as to what staying in London would mean, verses going back go Canada or Australia. And then finally, after we landed on Canada, we had to decide if we would move to Toronto, or if we try out the small town life in Bruce County (where I grew up).

Jack and I couldn’t make a final decision on whether we were city mice or country mice, so we cast our job application net wide in both Toronto and Bruce County. 

What happens? Jack landed a job in Bruce County and I landed a job in Toronto. Here we are again! 

Without knowing what lied ahead of us, we gave both jobs a crack. I had a small flat in Toronto, commuting from Point Clark, leaving my family behind and staying in the city 4 days per week. Then we experienced one of the worst Ontario winters in over two decades, with countless snow days and road closures across the county, making it very difficult to commute into work. Let’s just say, I drove in some pretty dodgy road conditions. Alas, fate brought that job in Toronto to an end, with the company that I so carefully joined, restructuring their business, closing down their office and laying me off (just 3 months after I started). 

Back to the drawing board for moi! 

Thankfully, I was not unemployed for very long. Within 2 weeks, I secured another job working as EA to the President & CEO at South Bruce Grey Health Centre. Currently, I am providing a 12-18 month maternity cover and learning the ropes in the world of healthcare. Funny enough, the site I’m currently based at is the Walkerton Hospital, which is the very place I was born. Talk about full circle.

The Reckoning 

In 2017, I published a blog post about the profound life lessons that I learned after travelling the world for nearly 18 months. I offered some wisdom that has seemingly left me since. I wrote, ‘Changing your location, doesn’t fix your problems. Regardless of where you are in the world, your demons will chase you. While travelling around the world provides a healthy environment for healing, you still have to make the choice to heal.’ There was only so much healing I could do without facing it head on. Coming back home has challenged me in many ways, yet has freed me in others. I left my hometown when I was 18 years old, only coming back for periodic visits. That’s nearly 20 years of living away from the place I grew up. I was the youngest of 4 kids. Unsurprisingly, I needed to go carve out my own independence and show myself my own capabilities. I did just that and it was everything I needed, but now my challenge is keeping it. I’m different and yet I’m the same.

My 2025/26 resolution is to learn how to merge the person I’ve become, to the person I once was. The container we currently live in, meets the requirements for such an endeavorer. I live on a fresh water lake, 5 minutes from my parents, in a house on 3 acres of land. I fall asleep to the crickets and wake up to the birds. I can always find a parking spot and I breathe in clean air. The community has welcomed us in and best of all, our daughter Ava is so happy living this small town life. It may not be the place for us forever, but it is the perfect place for now. Plus, this container is the key to my journey of holistic resolve – with myself, my family and my past. 

So, it’s been decided, we’ll be country mice.